a rose by any other name smells different

Please enjoy Sheena Iyengar as she shares her research and ‘the art of choosing’

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our choices define us

From the friends you choose to the clothes you wear, each choice you make helps to define your life’s mosaic. Consider the defining moment in your life: your college/university; your course of study; where to live; which job to take; communities to join – all define you. But it is more than the big decisions. Even the little decisions, when collected together, create your life mosaic. Think of each decision as a Polaroid photo. Each day you make hundreds of decisions. Over time these snapshots create a collection that is, when viewed from a distance, a mosaic of your life – who you are.

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do you trust yourself?

When you trust yourself, you are able to trust your own inner processes. Processes that help you to discover and create who you really are – to tune into your own uniqueness. If self trust is overshadowed by fear, you can become defensive and rob yourself of the richness of your life experiences and end up living a half life. To continue on the way of fear is a fast road to loneliness, alienation, and unconnectedness. Which leads to more distrust and fear.

trust begets trust; fear escalates fear

Remember the brown-haired woman we met in “is your inner child sabotaging you?” She discovered she was using an old story about trust as her inner process and it was based on fear. So in situations where she exhibits fear, she is met with caution and defensiveness in others. She wasts her energy on worrying about others’ motives and hidden meanings. This leaves no energy for discovering herself and creating a meaningful, authentic life including meaningful relationships.

do you trust yourself?

“Keep reading to find out the answer…”

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is your inner child sabotaging you?

story of the brown haired girl

There is a brown haired girl sitting in the last row of Sister Magdalen’s 3rd grade class. She’s got her nose burried in a book and has her pencil at the ready to write in her composition book should someone come over to talk to her. These free periods are worse than the actual lessons. Most of the other students are huddled around one another’s desks chatting and giggling and some were drawing. But not the brown haired girl. She’s always alone.

Suddenly one of the girls comes from behind to ask the brown haired girl a question. “You’re a girl scout, right?”
The brown haired girl turns in her chair to answer “Yes”
“So how would I join if I was interested?”
“I guess I could ask my mom…..” Just then there was a burst of laughter in the front of the room. The girl asking the questions looked up over the brown haired girl and smiled, no laughed. The brown haired girl turned around to see two of her classmates hanging a sign up on the wall above the chalkboard and right behind the teacher. It was a sign directed at the brown haired girl.

Scope. Once in the morning does it.

The little brown haired girl was embarrassed. Hurt. Crushed. The stress and anxiety she experienced on a daily basis which led to her undetected the stomach ulcer was the cause of her bad breath. But she didn’t know that. All she knew was that today, she learned a valuable lesson. She established a truth she would carry with her into adulthood: Never trust anyone who is nice to you; Never trust those in charge (teacher) to protect you from harm.

Read the rest of the story and what it means to you here

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