To be, or not to be: that is the question
~William Shakespeare
Powerful questions can be used in coaching, self-reflection, leadership development, team collaboration, and even critical thinking. Often one question can be enough to ignite an illuminating conversation ending in the all powerful ‘ah ha’ moment of a client or team mate. Below is a collection of 30 questions I have used over the years in coaching, consulting, self-reflection, and in a collaborative team setting. If these inspire critical thinking on your part, then I can enjoy the knowledge that I can inspire from a distance. If these questions inspire more questions, please let me know by leaving a comment.
- Is that true?
- How do you know that?
- What data is that claim based on?
- What do others say that support your/my argument?
- What evidence would you give to someone who doubted your interpretation?
- Can you put that another way?
- What’s a good example of what you are talking about?
- What do you mean by that?
- Can you explain the term you just used?
- How do you think the other person views the situation?
- You have only two years to live and will do so with your usual energy and vitality. What will you do with your last two years?
- What are you not telling me that I need to know?
- You just won a $100 million lottery jackpot. What will you do with the rest of your life
- What is your life like 1 year from now?
- Describe the context of your situation
- What is keeping you busy these days
- What is keeping you up at night?
- When was the last time you lost track of time? what were you doing at that time?
- What are you doing now to shape your life of tomorrow?
- What can you stop doing to make room for change?
- What are you holding on to that no longer serves you?
- What assumptions are you making in this situation?
- What do you want? what do you need?
- Is there an easier way?
- What is within your power to change?
- What do you want the outcome to be in this situation?
- What needs to change?
- Am I judging based on my own values or theirs?
- What is the point of view of the person sitting across the table?
- Is what I’m about to say helping to achieve our/me goal? Does it add value?
What powerful questions do you use? Which of these 30 is your favorite?
Yes, nice one, Amanda. It is a very revealing question.
Linda, your twelfth question “What are you not telling me that I need to know?” reminded me of a time several decades ago, when I was at University. I was getting all hot and bothered about something, can´t rember what. One of my lecturers asked “What is really at issue here?”. That question released what it was that he needed to know, that I hadn´t realised he needed to know and the problem suddenly seemed much easier to resolve.
My current challenge is improving my German, so I will take some of these questions and translate them so that they are ready on the tip of my tongue.
Now, a question: Sometimes when you are having a bad day and someone asks what the matter is, the only honest answer seems to be “nothing and everything, or at least nine different things”. Do you have a good question to unlock that impasse? If I had to choose from the ones above I think it might be to shift the time frame either backwards, as suggested by Amanda or forwards, as in two years to live, what would you change.
Are you familiar with this feeling feeling being out-of-sorts and overwhelmed?
Jenny,
Thanks for sharing your story about University. That is a great example, and stories are also very powerful tools!
As far as feeling out-of-sorts and overwhelmed – yes! I have days like that myself and I’ve experienced clients with those feelings as well. There are many approaches to take, and it often depends on the individual having the experience, but one approach I have used is to have them write down all of the things that are ‘on their mind.’ Often getting things out of our heads and putting them on paper helps keep things into perspective. Then we look at them one by one and use some of the powerful questions above, like ‘is this really true?’
I use that technique for myself on the days that I feel overwhelmed. Let me know if that works in your situation.
Ciao
~Linda
Amanda,
Great question! I love how you focus on the positive – a taste of appreciative inquiry. I also like that you help the person ground the experience by focusing on the feelings – truly bringing them back to the moment in their mind and body.
Thanks for sharing your powerful question.
~Linda
Ruth,
Thanks for stopping by! And thanks for the great powerful question. I know you have a great deal of successful experience with change in organizations, so I know this is a winner question.